Feeling so strange, so weird, seeking for someone to tell me "No, it's not the truth, it's just a nightmare"
Feeling, like you don't want to talk about what annoys you with anyone, even with yourself, feeling like depressed, frustrated, shocked from the reaction of someone so close to you.
There are times when we forgive, forgive just because we don't want to stay angry from someone so close to us, because we don't want to build a gap, because so many reasons except caring for ourselves, except respecting our deep feelings for a single time, and what's more difficult and cruel, that when you come over your feelings and say sorry for someone hurt us really, and owe you a big apology, and everytime you say "Be better, he will always remember that you are doing this because you love him, and will take that into consideration the second time, and unfortunately this second times never comes", and what's more funny and annoying at the same time, is that it turns out to be that you are always on the wrong side, that you always have silly needs and wants,..etc.
And at a certain time, you feel like; you can't forgive anymore, you can't apoligize anymore, because there were millions of times that you wanted just to hear a simple nice word to heal you and you found nothing. you feel like, yes if you even were overreacting or were so angry and rude, but it's ok, you always were polite, and considerate and nobody considered your feelings, so it's time that they could keep up with you in a bad mood, like you were always doing with them.
Feeling, like you don't want to talk about what annoys you with anyone, even with yourself, feeling like depressed, frustrated, shocked from the reaction of someone so close to you.
There are times when we forgive, forgive just because we don't want to stay angry from someone so close to us, because we don't want to build a gap, because so many reasons except caring for ourselves, except respecting our deep feelings for a single time, and what's more difficult and cruel, that when you come over your feelings and say sorry for someone hurt us really, and owe you a big apology, and everytime you say "Be better, he will always remember that you are doing this because you love him, and will take that into consideration the second time, and unfortunately this second times never comes", and what's more funny and annoying at the same time, is that it turns out to be that you are always on the wrong side, that you always have silly needs and wants,..etc.
And at a certain time, you feel like; you can't forgive anymore, you can't apoligize anymore, because there were millions of times that you wanted just to hear a simple nice word to heal you and you found nothing. you feel like, yes if you even were overreacting or were so angry and rude, but it's ok, you always were polite, and considerate and nobody considered your feelings, so it's time that they could keep up with you in a bad mood, like you were always doing with them.
I remember so much, this song of Elton John" Sorry seems to be the hardest word". but it's like this for some people not for everyone. some say it while they don't want to because they want others to say it to them, and those others feel like it's so hard word for them to say....
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